My personal Eucharistic miracle

(NTC/Juan Guajardo)

When we hear of Eucharistic miracles, we tend to think of the extraordinary phenomena wherein the Lord removes the thin veil between our natural perception and the supernatural reality of Christ’s real presence in the Eucharistic species. The type of Eucharistic miracle I would like to share is of a different sort: an immediate moral miracle at my first Holy Communion.

I write this with great fear and trembling, for it is a public confession of sorts. However, in the spirit of “The Confessions of St. Augustine,” it may help some poor soul to hear how the Lord has worked in my life.

Much against the proper upbringing afforded by the Christian devotion of my family, I began taking the Lord’s name in vain chronically and without remorse for many years, beginning as a teen, continuing well into my adulthood. 

There are any number of reasons for this, such as growing up in locker rooms, etc. The chief of all causes, however, was simple indifference. Regardless of my devotion to the Lord in other areas, I did not cultivate an appreciation for His good, holy name, regularly abusing it in vain to a grotesque extent.

Sadly, this continued into my years of RCIA formation. While I was becoming progressively aware of any number of issues I needed to work on in my life, for whatever reason, proper respect to the Second Commandment never came on my “radar.” Then the Easter Vigil happened. I was received into the Church at the Easter Vigil in 2012 where I made my Profession of Faith and received confirmation and first Holy Communion. Unbeknownst to me, something happened to me at this moment, as evidenced by what happened afterward.

After the Vigil, while soaring on an emotional high and walking through the parking lot heading back to my car, I overheard a man walking down the street who, by all appearances, was intoxicated. Suddenly, I suffered physical pain, which felt like an ice pick in the ear. He was taking the Lord’s name in vain with vulgarity, and I was unable to bear it. More to the point, I still cannot.

To this day, after 13 years of being a Catholic, not only do I no longer take the Lord’s name in vain, I cannot bear the physical pain of hearing His name defiled. This is what I call a miracle!

I wish to express the extent to which this was a movement wholly born of God’s sanctifying grace by participating in His divine nature through receiving His Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity. This sudden change in my heart and mind had nothing to do with me.  

I want to take this opportunity to thank the Lord, in writing, for saving me from further insulting His holy name. My previous indiscretions and sins could be piled to the heavens if they were counted, but our Lord of mercy saw fit to renew me through giving me more of Himself, opening my mind and heart to His love, spurring me on to express my love for Him more fully. 

I beg the Lord to maintain this state of my soul, for I cannot bear going back to what I once was. Of course, there is much work yet to be done in my continual sanctification, but if God saw fit to affect such a miraculous change in my life, I am confident in my hope of Him helping me the rest of the way to glory.     

May we all remember the importance of the Second Commandment and, in seeking His grace, ask for the strength to reverence Him properly. As we do, let us never forget the power residing in the gift of the Most Blessed Eucharist wherein our Lord seeks to supernaturally empower us with a participation in His divine nature to live life to the fullest in anticipation of seeing Him face to face.

Jason Whitehead is the diocesan director of evangelization and catechesis. He entered the Church in 2012 and subsequently received a master’s degree in theology. Find his regular columns for the North Texas Catholic here.